Brannigan's Law

There was a television show that aired in 1988 called Empty Nest. Starred Richard Mulligan as Dr. Harry Weston, and a supporting cast. Not a very popular show.
In one episode, the 'randy' neighbor Charlie gets a new license plate for his car. His intention was for it to read "C-Lover" as he was Charlie, and also a ladies man. He had abbreviated his name due to space constraints on the plate, but when the fine people at the State correctional facility stamped the plate, the letters were right, but were instead squished together reading CLOVER. Thus making for a tidy little punch line at the end of the show.
You and I are both wondering why this trivially useless information is stuck in my head when so much of what I tried to learn at university never actually took. I suppose it doesn't matter. Why, though, am I recalling this? It's because I went to see the J.J. Abrams movie Cloverfield, and BAM!!! There is Charlie holding his personalized plate right in the front of my mind.

C-Lover field is an interesting take on a genre that is difficult to find success in. The last big crack at a monster movie that I can think of was Godzilla with Matthew Brodrick (who I really like in movies). It wasn't great. The twist here is that it's all from the point of view of a few regular civilians like you and me who live in New York when a monster starts wrecking a few mortgage insurers days.
There will be the inevitable comparisons to the Blair Witch Project due to the shakiness and nausea inducing movement onscreen but that aside; I liked the take and the style of the movie.
C-Lover field had almost everything you could want in a monster movie plus a bonus:

1) One giant monster inexplicably wrecking New York (without a reservation I might add).

2) The American armed forces firing stockpiles of weaponry at the monster without avail.

3) People exploding from contact with monsters.

4) Smash and grab riots.

5) People recovering from terrible wounds to go running through the streets when they were near death and unconscious only minutes before.

6) Helicopter crashes.

7) A Rancor.

Plus a bonus of mini-monsters! The giant monster sloughs off little monsters that eat marines, and when you're bitten by one of them, you explode in an hour and a half! Bonus indeed!

The film is played off as Government evidence of the events that happened with this monster. It's a handycam movie which was intended to be a documentary of this guys going away party before moving to Japan (he's screwed either way monster wise...Japan's no stranger to them).
Then the Statue of Liberty's head comes rolling down the street, panic ensues, there's a mission to find this girl, another girl explodes, yada, yada,ya. It's a monster movie. The effects are great, and the monster's cool.

But, as much as I liked the take on a monster movie...this movie lacked the 'Awesomeness Factor'. The Blair Witch Project was scary. So scary in fact that Matt Connelly and Jacob Perry held each other in the theater, and Jacob pretty much cried all the way home after dropping Matt off at his place. He was sure the witch was going to pop out of the woods and get him. This proves the movie had the 'Awesomeness Factor'.
Not once on my way home this afternoon did I expect to see a giant monster pooping little monsters while trashing Charlottetown, all while my dad (He was in the Militia) trying to start up the one tank that's still on P.E.I (It's for decoration) to fight back. There was no chance of this happening, so it wasn't that scary. So...what would have made this movie better?

You certainly can't make this movie any more 'real' without using a three toed sloth as the monster...but that's not really scary. Plus a sloth is, like, really slow, so it'd be, like, easy to evacuate the city before anyone got hurt. Instead my solution is to make it even more unrealistic. It would alsosolve the 'un-awesomeness' of two movies which left me feeling a little empty after watching them.
I say, combine the lackluster Fantastic Four movies with C-Lover field and you've got one damn fine movie. The monster from C-Lover field was incredibly awesome. One of the best ever....it is exactly the kind of thing the Mole Man dreams of creating to send to the surface to destroy New York. It's exactly the kind of thing that would put us all in awe while watching the Fantastic Four take it down.

If seeing the city of New York reduced to rubble is your thing....C-Lover field is the movie for you. But, the whole time, try to imagine the movie with the Fantastic Four in the fight of their lives trying to save the city....it would be awesome, astounding, heroic, intense, and unbelievable enough that you could suspend your disbelief and really enjoy it. Unlike C-Lover field alone...which really left me wanting more...